Why Be Scared of Arranged Marriage? Busting the Myths and Embracing the Journey


Arranged marriages often evoke a mixture of apprehension and curiosity. While the concept might seem daunting, especially for those unfamiliar with it, there are numerous reasons why one shouldn't be scared of arranged marriage. Let’s explore the common fears and why they might be unfounded for those living in Bangladesh or abroad.

The Fear of the Unknown
Myth: "I don't know the person well enough. What if we’re not compatible?"
Reality: In arranged marriages today, families and individuals invest time in getting to know potential partners. There are meetings, conversations, and even dating-like experiences to ensure compatibility. It's like a well-organized job interview, but with more tea and samosas.
Instance: Think of it as a social media profile—it's not just the picture; it’s about reading the bio, interests, and mutual friends.

The Pressure to Conform
Myth: "I have no choice in the matter. My parents are forcing me."
Reality: Modern arranged marriages are a collaborative effort. Parents might suggest potential matches, but the final decision rests with the couple. It’s more of a guided introduction rather than a forced arrangement.
Instance: It’s like your parents being your personal matchmakers, minus the swipe left and right. They’ve just upgraded from Facebook to real-life matchmaking!

The Cultural Stereotypes
Myth: "Arranged marriages are outdated and regressive."
Reality: Arranged marriages have evolved with time. They now blend tradition with modern values, focusing on mutual respect, shared goals, and personal growth. It’s about preserving cultural heritage while embracing contemporary practices.
Instance: Imagine combining the best of both worlds—traditional values with modern swag. It’s like having biryani with a side of sushi.

The Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) on Love
Myth: "What if I don’t fall in love?"
Reality: Love in arranged marriages often blossoms over time. The initial connection, based on mutual respect and understanding, lays a strong foundation for love to grow. It’s not about the love-at-first-sight cliché but about building a deep, meaningful relationship.
Instance: Think of it as a slow-cooked curry—flavors deepen and get richer with time, unlike fast food which is just quick and forgettable.

The Concern About Family Dynamics
Myth: "I’ll be marrying the whole family, not just the person."
Reality: While family involvement is a significant aspect of arranged marriages, it can also be a source of support and strength. Understanding family dynamics and setting boundaries helps create a balanced relationship.
Instance: Yes, it’s a package deal, but think of all the extra hands for household chores and the endless supply of homemade goodies!

The Fear of Cultural and Personal Adjustments
Myth: "What if I can’t adjust to the new lifestyle or traditions?"
Reality: Adjustment is a part of any marriage, arranged or love. The key is open communication and willingness to understand and embrace each other’s backgrounds. This cultural exchange can enrich your life and broaden your horizons.
Instance: Adjustments are like trying a new cuisine—you might hesitate at first, but once you develop a taste, you’ll love the variety it brings.

The Myth of Compromise Over Happiness
Myth: "Arranged marriages require compromising personal happiness for familial obligations."
Reality: Healthy relationships involve compromise from both partners, leading to mutual happiness. In an arranged marriage, the support of families can enhance the couple’s happiness, providing a robust support system.
Instance: It’s like sharing your Netflix account—initially, you compromise on what to watch, but eventually, you find series that you both love binge-watching together.

Embracing Arranged Marriage Instead of fearing arranged marriages, view them as a different path to the same destination—a loving, fulfilling, and enduring partnership. The combination of family support, cultural richness, and modern practices makes arranged marriages a unique and viable way to find lifelong companionship.

In the end, it’s not about how you met, but how you build and nurture the relationship. So, whether you’re embarking on this journey in Bangladesh or anywhere else in the world, approach it with an open heart, a positive mindset, and a dash of humor. After all, every love story is unique, and yours will be no exception.